Sunday, July 31, 2005

fuelled with violence

Just home from watching Sin City. Oh My Gawd. All the blood! All the gore!! Oh, the horror!!!

... I like. *evil glint in eyes*

All the men who adore pure bloody violence in its goriest, this is SUCH a must-see. Characters in the show do not just kill. They like to torture. And the methods used to carry out such delicate tasks of tormenting their victims (or in some cases, their tormentor) as like in no way ever shown on local screens without having half the film censored.

Yes, you read me right. UNCUT. Well, almost.

But trust me, you still get BULK of the almost nauseating bloodfest. There were only THREE parts in the show that I felt was slightly "edited" (in actual fact, removed).


1) The scene where Marv (the big ugly guy with ENORMOUS strength and tact, played by Mickey Rourke) should have been chopping/cutting/sawing off the limbs of Kevin (a disturbingly calm and swift cannibal played by Elijah Wood).

2) A cut where Miho (Devon Aoki) erm, cut a bastard policeman somewhere. I think it should have been the neck.

3) Nancy (the delectable Jessica Alba) was probably doing/saying something sexual to Hartigan (our beloved veteran actor, Bruce Willis, with an amazing looking body). Pity we never got to see it. This is SUCH an obvious cut. And if its not, well, the film editors did a bad job.

I can't understand the mentality of allowing such highly violent films to be shown as R(21), and still end up removing some scenes. C'mon. If the bulk of the show is bad enough to "evoke violent thoughts" in young people, don't show it at all. Like what always happens to violent films. Why bother to bloody show it, and then waste time and manpower just to censor parts of it?

If films are given the green light, show the production as the way it was meant to be seen. Not with any part/s of it missing. Has anyone ever considered the effort the crew and cast put in for every single bloody scene? They didn't work throughout the nights just so that their film can be mutilated once it gets to our shores.

Show it in its full glory. Or don't at all.

And for fuck's sake, at least do a good job at the editing. The film shouldn't bloody JUMP at each cut scene.

Oh, and for the men, did I mention the bared tits and hot babes dressed in slivers of leather??

Friday, July 29, 2005

bored but busy

Mundane routines of going to work, coming back home and sleep. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

I am currently temping for a month with this electronics company, so pardon me if I seem to be blogging much less. Money comes first. I almost feel as if I'm selling my soul for cash.

Anyone read the interview of Sarong Party Girl in Today? Hubs specially brought it back for me, although I really don't know why. She's not my idol or anything, and seriously, the photos they had of her seem to cheapen her image. I'm sure she's got better pictures of herself than those they took.

Time to hit the sack.

Musical Baton Relay!

My first baton EVER!! Thank you, darkmuse. I wonder if I should be glad or sad... =p

Total Volume Of Music Files On My Computer :
Only 3.85 GB?!?! I am almost shocked to find that I have yet built my library back up. I lost 9.8GB (ALL MY MUSIC) when I was accidentally deleted my WHOLE music folder months ago.

The Last CD I bought was :
I don't usually buy CDs. I just hint people to buy them for me. Heh. The last addition to the CD rack was The Annual 2004 -
Ministry of Sound given to me on my birthday. Hell, that was long ago. Someone buy the latest Craig David album for me!!

Song playing right now :
Gary Gecko & Jon Carter Vs. Hoxton Whores - Double Drop

5 Songs I Listen Alot to or Mean Alot to Me:
Naked - Raining on the Sky
David Usher - Black Black Heart
Blank and Jones Ft. M. Francis - Someone Like You
Goo Goo Dolls - Iris
Lifehouse - Somewhere in Between

The five songs that just pop into my head (in accordance). I'll leave the non-English songs out cos I'm feeling lazy to type in cheena text.

5 People I'm passing the baton to:
Missus Gabriel

Monday, July 25, 2005

hungry bookworm

Since I am feeling slightly better compared to the past few days, I decided to tell you guys all about my visit to the spanking new National Library on Saturday!!

Well, as an idiot would know, the library has many many books covering many many different topics. They also have many many storybooks. By storybooks, that would mean fiction.

Most of the books there are very very new. And it is the FIRST National Library Branch that actually carries ALL of Ben Elton's books!! I was almost crazy enough to want to loan all those that I haven't read before. Luckily Hubs stopped me from being stupid and I ended up going back with only two of his books. I just finished "Blast from the Past" and am starting with "The Other Eden". I adore reading Ben Elton's books!

I also got a book titled "Wicked Poems". Want to know what it's about? Here's a short poem from the book:

Mama, Mama by Harry Graham

Mama, Mama, oh what is this
That looks like strawberry jam?
Hush, Hush, my dear, 'tis poor Papa
Run over by a tram.

Fine. So it is a children's book. But I always find that poems are ageless. Particularly such naughty ones. =p

Go on and drop by the new library!! The books are all so new and in mint condition, you'll be silly not to go borrow a couple of them now. It's almost guaranteed that you won't have missing pages!!

ill and crazy

My voice is almost a deep gruff sort of sexy. Think Zoe Tay. *sultry pout*

The bad news here is, coughing intermittently is not sexy at all. Especially not when I am spraying bits of saliva and phelgm onto your face. Please, Goddess of Bodily Fluids, take away my phelgm. And while you're at it, tell me, can women actually ejaculate?

There have been reports of women being able to ejaculate at times of orgasm, but no scientific evidence has actually proved that it is true. I am sick of being told that it could just be pee. I do not pee when I'm coming. Trust me on that one. I have been peeing for the last 22 years and I know what peeing feels like.

If anyone has actually watch video clips of ejaculating women, please do not be fooled. Some of these women really ARE peeing. You can easily see the yellow stream of liquid that's squirting out of the pee-hole on their clit. *SIGH* The deceptive porn industry.

Mine is nothing like that at all. But as graphically describing it could prove too *ahem* disturbing for some, I shall save everyone from that agonizing read.

I think my fever is escalating. I must be crazy to type out an entry like this. *scratches head in disbelief* Well, since it's here. I shall just let it be.

Sunday, July 24, 2005

with a flu bug

The bug's got me. My voice is hoarse, my nose is running, and I am oh-so-unhappy.

Thank God I can still drive fine even as I am shivering my tits off in the car. It is such a joy to be able to cruise down the streets. A dream finally fulfilled since I ever set eyes on a moving vehicle.

Pardon the lack of posts. I feel this bug will take its time to torment me.

The weather has been quite sucky. So everybody, take care of yourselves. =)

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

a pile of mess

I've finally removed the song. Finally figured out that it may be irritating some people, particularly since it has already been playing itself up here for the past few weeks. Pardon me if you were one of those who got the shits from it.

I am currently in a pile of mess.

Anxiously anticipating the results of yesterday's interview and being haunted by a dream I had last night. It wasn't a nightmare of any sort, but more of a scene from a past relationship.

I have no idea why it affects me so. I awoke crying my eyes out. And later, when I was downstairs watching MTV and eating keropok, I did it again to Mariah Carey's video "We Belong Together".

No, it wasn't the MTV. It was a lame video as all Mariah Carey videos go. It was more of the song.

I hate Samuel for affecting me with that "We Belong Together" thing.

But even though the song goes as such, my ex and I were never meant to be together. He was an angel in most senses of the word "boyfriend", and I was just out to squeeze him dry of any postive emotions. I was a bad girlfriend. I probably still am. But thank God my current title is now "wifey".

I am feeling all emotional again. Must be the job interview.

I shall relax myself by taking a drive later. Maybe just drive myself home for awhile just to spend time with my brother. I heard he misses me.

Staring into space and ranting away online never did anyone any good, probably other than the famous bloggers, so I shall sign off without a proper ending and just let this day be for the remaining 5 hours. Meanwhile, I will just sit on the porch and wait for Hubs to come back for dinner...

--- --- ---

If anyone is in the mood for sad love songs like "You're Beautiful", try taking a listen to Rachael Yamagata's "Be be your love" and "I'll find a way". For more angsty heartache songs, "Best Of You" by the Foo Fighters should work well. Slow rock wise, take "Somewhere in Between" by Lifehouse.

The lyrics all go about the same shit of unrequited love and all that. But each has a different flavour. I'm repeating all of them on iTunes. =)

Saturday, July 16, 2005

a rainy Saturday indoors

It has been raining on and off these few days, sparking off my love-hate relationship with rain again.

I used to get so excited whenever the sky started pouring. I would find reasons to get out just to get myself wet from the downpour. The cool, tingling sensation after being drenched by nature's shower was unbeatable.

Maybe I was just a young child then, simply amazed by the way the way rain falls from seemingly nowhere. And how I loved that smell of fresh rain in the early mornings. I would stick my hand out of the window just to feel that rain and be part of it. Such simple pleasures in life...

Then can my rebellious teenage years of skipping school and falling asleep in class. Despite how people always say it's great to sleep in on rainy days, I would always be awake, just admiring the rain fall through the classroom windows. Days like that in school made me feel energised, not lethargic. I was a strange brat.

If it ever happened to be raining when it time to go home, I would walk my proud little ass all the way to the bus-stop drenched. The boys loved doing it too, but it was probably also because they never ever brought umbrellas to school. Umbrellas were for sissys and the girly. I was neither. So I walk unprotected from the hard raindrops hitting my body.

Quite often, I would board the bus 31 to greet a hundred amused faces scrutinising my see-through school blouse sticking closely to me like a second skin. Why? Have they never seen people drenched from heavy rain before?

Amazingly, I never ever did fall sick even once after getting that wet. I guess I was a strong girl. But not anymore...

When I was 17, I fell critically ill for a few months, and I was never able to walk in the rain like I did before. That put an end to my "singing in the rain" days. Boy was I upset.

Nowadays, I have to stay indoors when it rains to prevent falling sick almost immediately. Sometimes memories of strolling in the rain with my boys revisit me. And like an old geezer, I can only wear a contented smile and say, "Those were the days..."

Nostalgia always hits me on rainy days...

Friday, July 15, 2005

a drunken night owl

My sleep cycle has been all screwed for the past few days... I knew I had to get it back because of some impending appointments that will have to be fulfilled. Work. *grimace*

Therefore, I refused the comfort of bed, blankie, bolster and pillow on Wednesday night, and continued with my packed Thursday schedule of friend-meeting, Orchard window shopping and Siam Supperclub Ladies' Night.

The outcome?

Maybe I was too zombified by the time I got to Siam, or because the drinks were watered down way more than before the place got renovated, but in any case, I got drunk. Yes. Drunk.

It was embarrassing to have Hubs come pick me up after my crazed drinking-dancing-smoking stint. I was not walking straight, and I can tell you that I haven't got like that for ages. I was giggling like a stupid Japanese schoolgirl. And I was even half as "kawaii" (cute) as them.

Hubs and I managed to half drag, half walk me home from the multi-storey carpark, where I immediately collapse on the floor of my balcony laughing at my own drunken stupor amidst apologising to the highly amused Hubs for my inappropriate behaviour. My head was spinning so bad I thought I was going to die.

I called on all my limbs to cooperate as I stumbled my way over to my room and got changed. I even managed to put my stinky clubbling clothes into the laundry basket in the kitchen!! I am so proud of my drunken self for doing that...

I giggled while packing my barang-barang for staying over at his place. I even threw in some Hacks candies! He watched me with strange laughing eyes throughout...

He drove us back to his place, where upon reaching, I ran out of the car and threw up into the nearest drain by squatting down right in front of it. So unglam. After he dragged my into the house in the quietest way possible without waking his sleeping parents, I asked for food. Being the lovely husband that he is, he ventured out on his own to the nearby Macpherson coffeeshop to get some Kway Chap for us.

Before he left, he made me swear that I would be awake to finish the food when he got back. Of course I promised. Then, when he got back, I was dead asleep. And snoring. *lol* Poor hubs.

Such way of handling a drunken me is so unsuitable. Never believe what I say/promise when I'm that drunk. Not that he's ever seen me drunk before. I guess it was a pretty interesting ordeal to him at the rate he was laughing at my drunken antics. I hope you had as much fun chasing after me as I had sauntering around like a madwoman high on alcohol. =)

Now I sit, eating the bowl of warmed-up Kway Chap from last night. Drunkenness is such bliss when you have someone so lovely and sweet to take care of you and clean up the tracks of your temporary stupidity. =)

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

seeking female clubbers

I am seeking females who club/party on weekdays. Read weekdays.

I do not understand why there are so many clubs offering Ladies' Nights and yet I cannot seem to find anyone to hit the dancefloor with. Where are all the happening people??

I understand that everyone has their daytime commitments, which usually leave them dead and only desiring the comfort of their partner/bed. But if that's the case, why are the clubs still filled to the brim with chicks and lads on such promotion nights??

Are my friends just plain boring people? Hmm... No offence, guys.

There are those who are working their asses off on weekdays and therefore just want a good night's rest to hit the office with the next day. Then the ones who are on a tight budget, cutting out all except the essential. Then the ones who actually have a curfew to meet. Yeah, some people still get that. There are some who don't give a flying fuck about Ladies' Nights cos they are men. And the good girls who actually don't club, don't drink, don't smoke. I really don't want to corrupt those.

So who's left? The students like me? Nope. They have curfews and budgets to watch.

A particular female classmate of mine, who seemed so keen to go clubbing at ChinaBlack on Wednesday's night and egged me and my other friend on to go, has retracted her enthusiasm tonight through a series of unconvincing sms-es and phonecalls. Hmmph. So much for the excitement you showed last week, girl.

She claimed that she had a birthday party to attend at 6pm. Well, we won't be hitting the club til at least 9 or 10pm, so what's the big deal?

"Oh, erm, my friends might want to go somewhere after that mah. You know these things lah."

Yup. I do know these things. But don't you think that your friend, who would possibly be excited about his/her own birthday, would actually inform you of the birthday plans way earlier than that? So far I've not known of people who invite friends for the celebration in less than 24 hours before the event. Either you, or your friend, is lying. Pui.

In any case, there goes the planned-a-week-earlier clubbing session.

As what you've said before about asking me and her to the clubs and when we had to cancel, "Yay. No more fucking next time." That stands true for her too. And please return the book to her.

I hope you choke on your steamboat tomorrow. Lucky you if you actually lied about the birthday steamboat.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

watching erronous movies

To those who have watched the below "big budget" films, or are going to watch them, the following are some errors or that I have spotted throughout the film or some scenes that just didn't really seem to make sense:


1. The scene after Rachael Dawes (Katie Holmes) was gassed by the "Scarecrow", saved by Batman and then sent home by Alfred (the Butler) after being sedated by her saviour, she woke up in bed wearing a different top. She was wearing a light purple 3-quarter sleeved top when attacked and woke up in a brown top.

2. The powerful microwave machine thing that was used to vapourise Gotham City's poisoned water supply had a questionable point about it. Why did it not also evaporate/boil/vapourise the townsfolks' blood and/or water supplies in their bodies?? This is a machine that was supposedly SO powerful that it was capable of vapourising water (read, above 100°C) in a matter of seconds, but yet completely did not affect Batman and Liam Neeson as they were fighting around it on the train?? Give it a think...

On the overall, this was an entertaining and true to life account of a "superhero". Notice the quotes, as Batman is simply a martially well-trained man with a bank account almost impossible to deplete and a stock of high-tech war equipment.

He does not fit the exact bill of a superhero who possesses super powers, but yet at the same time, he gives hope to little children because it shows that any mere man (with lots of money) can become almost almighty.

Certain scenes of Batman failing/falling in his initial attempts of saving the city made this character more endearing than ever by showing that everyone fails in life. Just get up and go at it again. A good moral to pass down to the superhero-obsessed young, I would say.


This is generally a really entertaining film and so far, I've only have one curious thought. If the machines took in the human blood by sticking a tube into them, wouldn't the machines need to regurgitate them out from the "baskets" just to get their blood supply? Sounds quite tedious to me for such smart, highly technologically developed machines to do that... Swallow, then spit out, just to feed... Unless they were doing it just for torture's sake (which is an idea that Hubs came up with), I really don't see the point.


I would rate this as an action comedy as the banter between the characters can bring quite a bit of comic relief to this supposed seriousness of them turning into "freaks" with supernatural powers. Only one small flaw spotted in the scene where Johnny (aka the "Human Torch") was distracting the heat seeking missile away from his sister (aka the "Invisible Woman") and "The Thing" by turning his flame on and flying towards the ocean. A particular close-up shot showed that the "Fantastic Four" logo on his suit was inverted. Or in clearer terms, was a mirror image. The logo is supposed to be on his left breast, but in that shot, it was on the right and the number "4" was a mirror image. Keep an eye out for it.

--- --- ---

If anyone has spotted anything else, please feel free to let me know. Or if you have any queries on any of the above movies that you think I may be able to answer, shoot. =)

Saturday, July 09, 2005

a packed schedule

Pardon the lack of posts these days. My schedule has recently been packed to the max, and I'm not even sleeping the days away. I've been meeting up with friends (both old and new) and I'm thoroughly enjoying myself.

No doubt my finances have been more than constricted, but it doesn't stop me from having lunch/coffee with these absolutely adorable people. Particularly to Ivory, my kindergarden classmate, whom I thought would be utterly boring to meet up with, due to the fact that we have not spoken for ages. Upon counting, around ten years. *lol*

Thank God everything turned out fine and we had a jolly good time talking about all sorts of topics under the sun. We both admitted to being unenthusiastic to the meet-up when she was heading off home, and we just laughed it off.

It is good to see you again, dearie. We must try to recreate our childhood days of running around crazy in Parkway... Haha...

--- --- ---

Also met up with Fiona after a disappearing act pulled by me for 4 months. I was in seclusion! What else can I say? And thanks to her craving for steak, the threesome (me, GGYY and Fio) went to Phin's Steakhouse at Orchard Cineleisure just to be served our food an hour after ordering. Pui. Fucking bad service. I don't care if the staff was being harassed by gangsters. It is YOUR issue. It should not have affected the quality of customer service. In any case, they didn't have the decency to inform us that they're having some problems and that our food will be served much later. We could at least be prepared to wait or we could choose to cancel orders and leave.

Fiona's not very happy either. Read her ramblings of Phin's Steakhouse here. Fio ah, I thought you said you would mention my account of the stupid Coke Light with lemon slices??

Just to explain myself further, I ordered a Coke Light at Phin's, and it came with a bloody lemon slice. The menu didn't state that. And I don't like it. Upon passing the drink around for the 2 girls to try, we all agreed that the lemon does taste VERY strong despite the fact that there is only ONE slice in the glass. I demanded a change, which the staff obliged to.

GGYY didn't understand why I'm being so fussy about the stupid lemon, so I gave her an analogy. "How would you like it if you ordered fish & chips and the chef dumped ketchup all over it when you don't like ketchup?"

She pondered for a moment, then nodded and said she now understands.

Sigh. I am not being picky. I just have expectations.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

the 5th month anniversary

I love you for the way you can make me smile.
By doing almost nothing at all...


A blur and a whirl. Unedited. Just like Life, and Love, is.

--- --- ---

An apology out to all those who are still single out there. I mean no harm in any form when I get all emotional like this. It is, after all, our 5th month since signing our lives away... =p

Hubs has been sweet, despite our ups and downs, climbs and falls. Love is so much compromising and understanding that sometimes I feel so inadequate in my giving as a partner. I almost feel like I am not doing enough. Sometimes I even feel like I'm doing nothing at all. *SIGH*

Love is such a beautiful and tormenting emotion....

5th month anniversary present

Thank you, sweets, for the lovely gift. I know someday you would get that lighter for me, but I just didn't think that it would now. Particularly since you forgot last month's anniversary completely...

I know in some way you are trying to make up for the nonexistent celebration last month, and this time round, having that stupid United Airlines confiscate my lighter prior to boarding made the purchase of the lighter almost necessary. But I still think it is a wee bit extravagant for a time like this. I promise I won't go shopping (much). =p

I am such a biatch. But I know you love me nonetheless. In fact, if I was any less of a bitch, you might not even have fallen for me!


Monday, July 04, 2005

ironic love

Pardon me while I digest this weekend's events slowly...

Such is the beauty (and torment) of LOVE.

One moment it breaks you and tears you apart with such a strong and invisible force that you are almost breathless from all the pain. The next moment is filled with such sweetness and unexplainable joy that you feel as though you were floating amongst the clouds up in heaven.

I love and hate this feeling. This inability to be in control of my emotions.

--- --- ---

We all grow up in life thinking that as we become older, we become more capable of controlling life's events. No more barking from the elders for us to do this, don't do that. Then we get hit by the most wonderful, and at the same time, the most puzzling emotion in human history. Love.

Parental and sibling love works very differently from the love between a man and a woman. (Not to be a heterosexual ass here, so I shall also state it as love between two genetically unrelated individuals. Man or woman, it doesn't matter.) We accept our family members for who they are, be it whether they were here before or after us. But when it comes to our prospective partners, we have ideals. We wish for them to act a certain way at a certain time, and even on occassions when they are incapable of performing the way we desire, we still hang on, waiting for them to "change".

Most of us who have been in relationships before would know that the best of us say that in love, don't try to change the other party. But who really listens? We want the ideal partner. Who doesn't? We want them the way we have dreamt of since our impressionable teenage years.

Sure. Year after year, as our dreams get dashed by one jerk after another asshole, our expectations of the next one that comes along becomes more and more achievable. Thus when even these simple requirements are not met, we get more disappointed than ever. But what can we do? We are drawn by an invisible force to compromise and to wait for our dream man, or woman, to be the way we wish they would be.

Some can wait for years, and still, this person never really becomes who we want them to be. The better of us wisen up and finally, often unwillingly, accept them for who they are. The ones who won't compromise their dreams (like me) move on to another partner who would hopefully mould themselves into who we want. If they don't, it means they don't love us enough.

--- --- ---

I can finally say that after being in the dating game for 8 years (6 years in one long running relationship), I think I may have finally matured.

I want nothing more than to be able to see/smell/touch you each day in my life. Life, with its ups and downs, is almost tormenting without your presence there to cheer me on. I don't want to change you to fit my bill of a perfect husband/lover, unless it's a change that you want.

No one's perfect. Neither am I.
Don't let me make you feel like you should change yourself just for me.

"Loving you not an obligation. It is a privilege."

Saturday, July 02, 2005

feeling weak

Why do I run back into your arms crying
even though just moments earlier I had told you to get out?

I feel weak. Like I'm fighting a losing battle.
A battle against myself and my unfounded love for you.
Why do you make me so fragile?
What is it that you do that makes me push you away
yet at the same time, wanting to hold you?

I almost hate you.

But not enough to make me not want to be with you.

--- --- ---

Pardon my recent signs of being extremely emo (emotional). I don't know what's come over me. I just know I want this man so bad, yet somehow he can crush me with the slightest things he do.

Love hurts. It's established.

Friday, July 01, 2005

a parting

It's amazing how you can make me
miss you terribly one moment,
and then to detest you so much
to the point of a break-up.

All I know is
you barely need to do anything.
It's just my own issues.
My own demons.
My own vulnerability.

My life is my own.
Likewise is yours.
So go forth,
do what you deem fit.

Despite the yearning within me,
I will swallow it down.
The road will be lonely
but without disappointment.

No one can have everything.
I choose to give up you
just for the sake
of stability.

missing you bad

I must stand my ground,
likewise for you.
But I cannot stop myself
from wishing you were here.

Wanting to watch you sleep,
and smile everytime you mutter unhearables.
Wanting to weasel my way
into your arms when I get upset or emotional.

Wanting to sneak pecks on your cheek
and hear you unconciously say "I love you".
Wanting to snuggle up to you
and to stick my head into that tiny space between your head and your shoulders.

Missing your shower-fresh smell
that calms me to sleep like a baby.
Missing your standard flip-over-hold-me-tight-and-whisper-I-love-you action.
Missing your comforting warmth holding me close.

I feel helplessly lost to your love.
I want you back, right here with me.

I feel like an arse for losing my cool earlier tonight.
It was just a movie, but to me, it was a date.
A date that we almost didn't have.
I'm sorry.

Right now, I just feel like dialling your number
and hearing your voice.
Just to tell you that I miss you terribly.
And how much I need you in my life.

This must be karma.
I finally miss you this very much.
Just like how you miss me each day at work.
It feels utterly shit.

James Blunt - You're Beautiful

This song is so stuck in my head. Don't know why. Don't want to know why.

I'm not going through any form of unrequited love at the moment, but it could have something to do with the miscarriage and hubs moving back to his parents' place. I'm just feeling emotional.

This song literally makes my heart ache and my knees weak. I am almost vulnerable.
I wish hubs was here.

Note: You can play or stop the song using the browser in the sidebar.

--- --- ---

James Blunt - You're Beautiful

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
F**king high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

trying to be back on track

Such an absolute honour to be "plugged" by Lancerlord and CowboyCaleb... No doubt the term "plug" itself was almost misleading to an extreme extent... Think "butt plug". I don't really like it much up my ass hor.

Certain memories of the unwanted sort came popping back into my head after the inappropriate use of the word "postnatal". I shall be alright after a few drinks and packs of smokes. I need some time alone to clear my head all over again.

Time has to heal everything. It has to.
Because even if it doesn't, I'll still have to swallow it all.