breakfast evokes weird feelings

Recalling the times when we were newly a couple, there were lots of coffee talks and early breakfasts. The couplings always led to one outcome, unbearable partings that couldn't be avoided. I guess it was shortly after all that momentary heartbreaks that you kept asking me to stay overnight at your place, night after night, until I was eventually staying there.

This morning brought back alot of those sweet memories. It is on such rare occassions that we leisurely enjoy breakfast together outside. I think it made me extra happy that my craving for fried fish was satisfied.

The intermittent kisses at the traffic lights and while waiting for your bus were so sweet and uplifting that I think I'm still floating right now. How is it possible that I can love you so much? Could love really be blind? If so, am I considered handicapped?

You make me almost as vulnerable as someone who is blind and defenceless. I just hope love makes me strong as much as it makes me weak. Likewise, I hope our love makes you strong to handle your daily shit and pull through the day to come home to me.

The grind of daily life has gotten all of us down, but it got to you the worse, with you slogging your guts out for this family. Hard work doesn't always beget high pay, but at least you are fortunate to be able to earn your bosses' appreciation and respect.

Everyday I wish I could help alleviate your stress, and I probably can by getting employed somewhere, but why do you condone me so by letting me laze around doing nothing? I know you love me, but am I really doing you any good by being this way?

I don't have anything to offer to you, except for my love. On some days, I start to wonder if that is enough in return for all that you give me. Such questions that I know you never want me to ask myself.

So today, I will aspire to be a good wife and finally change up the bedsheets and wash them. Meanwhile, I'll clean up the floor and wipe down the furniture as well. Come tomorrow, I'll be your cute little lazy wife again. :p

(Hasn't it been long since you came home and found me still sleeping soundly in bed? Is it that you've just been working too late, or is it that I've been waking up earlier these days?)